¶ vacuum

you think you found the one cause this fucking lady walks by and steps into your life and knows how to speak to you to think you have a connection, but trust me buddy, shes just old enough or lady enough to know how to speak to people and make a fucking connection while doing so. its not fucking something sublime or warranted by fate its basic conversation skills and if you cant get past that and realize that any one else can if they only had the interest and correct circumstance then youre young youre fucking young and you have no idea that you have no clue, but it aint your fault that you cant see until a certain point and thats just the way shit goes, and i know the ‘take it from me’ routine isnt gonna sink, shit, i know im a fuck up and what example am i, but im on a different route,  some people arent blessed, arent all fucking love and wishes, and id rather go through the throes of life than fucking flatline all day. i read this line ‘suddenly I saw:’ and good god damn how solid of a fucking feeling is that, it was in a book that i had been told to read by a  stranger while carrying around a copy of notes from the underground to give to a friend, just after having selected that copy in a round of translatory mortal kombat, weighing the first paragraph word for word with all translations available laid out, and im rounding the corner and here comes this kid saying, thats a good fucking book and that translation especially, and have you read this other shit she worked out, forget about it, youre holding that you know whats up, if you havent go read THIS.’ and so i did and there it was, suddenly i saw. i saw the movie universal soldier tonight which they call ‘Uni-Sol’s and shit sounds a lot like Eunice to me, and if that aint what being the perfect soldier is then i dont know what, sure you still got your dick, but your emasculated, castrated from your own life, like the eunice cant create more of. cut off.